American Dreamz Quotes

President Staton: Did you know there are two kinds of Iraqistanis?
[the First Lady holds up three fingers]
President Staton: I mean, actually, three?
Chief of Staff: You mean Sunnis and Shi'ites and Kurds?
President Staton: You knew about this?


[from trailer]
Martin Tweed: That's weird, one can become quite detached from reality when one's famous.
Sally Kendoo: That sounds so cool.


[from trailer]
Agha Babur: You must get to the championship round. When you are on stage with the president, you will have smuggled in an explosive.
Omer: What if I don't make it to the final round?
Agha Babur: Folks don't call me the torturer because I *don't* like to torture people.


Martin Tweed: Jessica, you make me feel like being a better person and I'm not a better person. I'm me.


Sally Kendoo: Martin, I'm not physically attracted to other people, but if you want me, I'm yours.


Reporter: See, people like the whole white trash thing.
Martha Kendoo: But we're not white trash.
Reporter: I know, but look what it did for Britney Spears.


Martin Tweed: I want an Arab. And a Jew. I want an Arab and a Jew.
Accordo: How about... An Arab-Jew?


Martin Tweed: I think I'm Omar-sexual.


Martin Tweed: Am I lovable?
Accordo: ...Yes. Yeah. Uh-uh. Yup.
Martin Tweed: How about you?
Ittles: I love you. That's all I know.


President Staton: Maybe it is time I read newspapers. I've learned a lot this morning. It turns out North Korea and Iran are not like Doctor Octopus and Magneto at all...


Sally Kendoo: You know... I used to weigh like 200 pounds. But then I told myself if I didn't lose at least 90 pounds before I turned 14, I'd kill myself.


Mrs. Kendoo: Hello William.
William Williams: Hi Mrs.Kendoo, is Sally there?
Mrs. Kendoo: No she's in New York with agents.
William Williams: Tell her I joined the army, I miss her and I got her face tattooed on my arm.


Sally Kendoo: I think it's time we broke up. Your life is here,
[puts her hand low]
Sally Kendoo: my life is here
[makes a rocket-like motion blasting off]


Ali Aziz: [Omer is doing horrible dance moves] What the hell is that? It looks like he stepped on a scorpion.


President Staton: It's not like in this country, where whites, and blacks, and Latinos all get along and there's no prejudicial deal between them. I mean these people
[in Iraq]
President Staton: , they have some longstanding beefs with each other.


Chief of Staff: The president and Mr. Putin had a nice talk. The president considers him a close friend, while of course deeply mistrusting his undemocratic tendencies.


Reporter: What about the rumours that the president had a nervous breakdown?
Chief of Staff: Nervous breakdown? Look fellows, I'd like to remind everyone that we're still at war here. The terrorists are going to exploit any sign of weakness and it's not a question of if, but when they're going to launch a major attack ending life on earth as we know it, so let's just try to keep a positive attitude.


First Lady: [about the re-election] You're wondering, what was the point of it all? Why you? Why now? Why did the Lord pick you out of all people? What are your special qualifications? And did the Lord even pick you, or was it just having really, really powerful friends?


Chet Krogl: Everyone in America thinks they're middle class. So they like to have someone to look down on.


Shazzy Riza: Hey Omer, want to go to the mall?
Omer: We just went last weekend.
Iqbal Riza: Yeah, and now we're going again.
Omer: Why, did you forget to purchase something?


President Staton: I've had speechwriters write for me all of my career and advisors telling me what positions to take. I can't even remember why I wanted to get into politics to begin with. I think it's because my mom wanted me to, to show my dad any idiot could do it.


Omer: I just feel confused... about this country. There are so many nice people here, but it does so much harm in the world... So to what degree is this country culpable for its actions. Are Americans to blame for America?


President Staton: In terms of the Middle East, it looks like the problems over there are never going to be solved. I mean never, never, never, never, never, never. So, I'm sorry about that...
Omer: Mr. President, I deeply hope for all of our sakes that you are wrong.
President Staton: I hope so too.


William Williams: I guess you two think I'm stupid. I guess you all think I'm stupid. Well, I'll show you how stupid I am: I'm going to blow myself up with this bomb I found.