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The CEO of
Tyson Foods manages to arrange a meeting with the Pope at the Vatican. After
receiving the papal blessing, he whispers, "Your eminence, we have an offer
for you. Tyson Foods is prepared to donate $100 million dollars to the
church if you change the Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily
bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken.'"
The Pope responds, "That is impossible. The Prayer is the word of the Lord -
it must not be changed."
"Well," says the Tyson man, "We anticipated your reluctance. For this
reason, we will increase our offer to $300 million dollars. All we require
is that you change the Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily bread'
to 'give us this day our daily chicken.'"
Again, the Pope replies, "That, my son, is impossible. For the prayer is the
word of the Lord and it must not be changed."
Finally, the Tyson guy says, "Your Holiness, we at Tyson Foods respect your
adherence to your faith, but we do have one final offer. We will donate $500
million dollars - that's half a billion dollars - to the great Catholic
Church if you would only change the Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our
daily bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken.' Please consider it."
And he leaves.
The next day the Pope convenes the College of Cardinals. "There is some good
news," he announces, "And some bad news."
"The good news is that the Church has come into $500 million dollars."
"And the bad news, your eminence?" asks a Cardinal.
"We're losing the Wonderbread account."
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